Today is the day.  The day I see some results.

(That makes it sound like I’ve actually accomplished something or completed a project… but no. )

No it’s not the results of all my hard work… it’s the results of my CT scan.  I’m going back to the ENT today.

I really don’t know what I want to hear.  They could say I need surgery.  That would be frightening and hopeful… Frightening because Rachel just had sinus surgery and it hasn’t sounded pleasant at all.  Hopeful because maybe it would help.  They could say I don’t need surgery.  That would be a disappointing relief.  Relieving because then I don’t have to have someone hack bits of my sinuses out of my forehead. Disappointing because then I have to just keep trying different prescriptions… prescriptions don’t actually help… they just make me rattle when I walk, spray stuff up my nose till I want to die, or feel like one of the ancient regulars at the pharmacy counter.  Soon the cute little girls in the lab coats or smocks will be calling me Ms. Maxwell and offering to write my checks for me and help me to the car.

I’m also expecting some other results today… replies to my emails to various seminary offices asking for mercy in the form of extensions.  (No no, not hair extensions… though I might need them if a certain little girl doesn’t stop making me want to pull my hair out.) Extensions in the form of delayed due dates… cause sniff, sniff… cough, hack… I can’t see straight or think clearly enough to write a theological masterpiece, a research paper, a book analysis, or even a sentence exegetical outline.

Really, I just need a nap.  I wish I was in preschool, I’d get an A in naps. But not snack time.  I’d get an F in snack time. My recent culinary decisions nearly sent me to the ER. Cheese is bad.  Cheese is bad. Cheese is bad.  I have to write this on the board 500 times then write an essay about the evils of pepperoni and sausage… Yeh can I get an extension on that?  Dry erase markers would make me dizzy and chalk dust would only make my allergies worse and… and… ooh is it nap time?

The phone rang early this morning.  I fumbled to pull it to my ear and heard a lovely voice… the automated school phone system saying that school is canceled due to inclement weather.  Ahhhhh!  The kids will be thrilled.  Not that they don’t love school… but they love snow days even more.

I should be driving to Springfield for class in an hour or two.  That won’t be happening.  I doubt I could make it down this mountain and to the interstate… and even if I could, I would have to take my kids with me.

I considered staying in bed but decided to roast some coffee and clean the dining room instead.  Ahhh the smell of … wait that’s not coffee, it’s orange scented Pledge.  I really must get my chronic sinusitis taken care of.  It’s bringing me down.  That’s the real reason I didn’t sleep in.  I couldn’t breathe.

I went to an ENT last week and had a CT scan of my sinuses this Monday.  I go back to the doctor next week to get the results and come up with a plan.

(I realize that with how seldom I write lately, this post could be on top of the front page for a while… This is what’s wrong with blogs… people read about the latest sinus infection and completely miss out on the genius hidden in the archives… yes, I said genius.)

I’ve been really sick for a while now.  I go to the doc once or twice a month and get antibiotics and various prescriptions hoping that it will help.  It never does.  Thankfully I’ve finally been referred to a specialist.

The sinus stupidity mixed with chronic pain have done horrible things to my seminary studies.  I have several incompletes hanging over my head.  The professors and administration have been merciful.  More merciful than I have, it makes me feel like a failure… you know what with all the failing and all.

The greatest thing about being sick or hurting all the time (besides being sick and hurting) is the lovely advice I receive… oh and the exhortation… gotta love exhortation.  Oooh ooh and suggestions that I’m sick because of spiritual weakness or sin in my life… I Love That!

Religious Jargon Alert: Exhortation
Definition 1: Exhortation is an act or instance of exhorting…well that clears it up doesn’t it? Let’s try the second definition, “language intended to incite and encourage”  Um… OK.  I always thought it just meant encourage. But in this context, I think the word incite fits better… which officially means spur to action but my specific situation makes me think of  ”incite to violence…” but I digress.

(Wow, I sound bitter and angry don’t I?  I’m not, I just have a headache and an early morning case of sarcasm.  Read everything I say with one of those little winky emoticons.  <— see doesn’t that look jovial?)

Yesterday morning, I felt miserable.  I wanted to get on facebook and ask all of my friends to pray for me… but I didn’t.  Because I didn’t want a lecture about faith or my inability to minister if I don’t believe God will heal me.

(For the record, Me and God… we’re doing pretty good.  Thanks for askin’.  I know he’s strong and loving and he knows I’m dust… we work well together that way… even if I don’t capitalize pronouns referring to deity. )

Gracious!  Do you see how disjointed this post has become?  Now we know why I haven’t written my final paper for Dr. Lim.  Perhaps I should sign off and go make breakfast for my little girl.

I love Zap Reader.  What is it?  Well the site says,

“ZAP Reader is a web based speed reading program that will change the way you read on your computer… There is nothing to install, it works with most popular browsers, and it’s totally free!”

I’m having a hard time with my eyesight lately but I have a TON to read for my studies.  Zap Reader has helped a lot.  I wish they had a mobile version or an iPhone app but they don’t… I sent an email to the developer requesting one though.

In the meantime, I have come up with a workable solution:

Create a bookmarklet on iPhone Safari browser:

1. Go to zapreader.com in the iPhone browswer.
2. Press the + button then “Add Bookmark” and “Save.” (Safari won’t allow you to edit the url here so we have to come back and fix it.)

3. Copy the following text:
javascript:location.href='http://www.zapreader.com/reader?URL='+encode URIComponent(location.href);

(If you can’t copy it on your iPhone, email it to yourself and copy it there.)

Go to your iPhone email and copy that text.
5. In Safari, press the bookmark icon then the edit button. Select the Zap Reader shortcut that you just made.  Replace the zapreader.com url with the bookmarklet url that you just copied.  Press done until you return to your browser.

To use the Zap Reader bookmarklet on the iPhone:
1. Go to the page you want to read.
2. Press the bookmark icon then the Zap Reader bookmark.
3. Turn your iphone to landscape then ’stretch’ and move the page so that the text will fill the screen.  Press play.

Jeremiah just completed his first 5K. I’m so proud of him, he ran the whole way. I’ll post videos soon.

Logging into Wordpress on Gentlewhisper.com is like finding an old forgotten journal… “Oh Yeh! I used to write in here!”

I approve a couple comments and ignore the highlighted reminder, “Wordpress 2.8.5 is available! Please update now.” “Yes, Yes I’ll do that soon,” I think to myself as I wipe the dust off of my neglected blog. “But first, I must update my readers… the few that haven’t forgotten me.”

October is nearly over and with it, half of my 6th semester at seminary. I’ve been sick and stressed, once again I find myself falling behind in my studies. I’m on day three of my antibiotics so hope still lingers.

We’re driving to Springfield in a few hours. Jeremiah is running a 5k tomorrow morning. I’m very excited for him. I wanted to run with him but my health won’t allow it. I’m afraid he’d have to drag his mommy across the finish line. We’ll enjoy the day in Springfield and maybe even go to a play at Evangel. As if that weren’t enough excitement for one weekend, Sunday morning gets even better. Joel is running a marathon! If you know his story, you know how incredible that is. I’ll retell the adventure next week when I have photos to go with it. Oh, I’m thrilled! Proud of my man and so very thankful.

Okay, let’s see… you need a quick life update.

Seminary:
I’m taking three classes. Building a Disciple Making Ministry, Communicating the Message II, and a New Testament study covering the epistles and Revelation. Fun fun.

Church:
We’re attending St. Robert First Assembly. It’s a small church with an interim pastor. I’ve had a lot of great opportunities to minister. I got to preach last week and I’ll get to lead the Wednesday night services in November and December. I’m loving it!

Family:
The kids love their new school. I baptized Jeremiah on Sunday. If I were a responsible blogger, I’d post some photos… but since I’m not, you can just check out the album on facebook. If I ever get caught up on my homework, I’ll write about that day.

Military:
I’m assigned to the 102nd Training Division at Ft. Leonard Wood. My first battle assembly is November 7th. Three other chaplain candidates from AGTS are assigned to my unit. I’m so excited!

Misc:
Now that I’ve started writing, I realize we have a lot of catching up to do! I’ll have to write again soon. Here are a few possible topics:

1. Tech Tangents: Mini 9 died, Dremel Tool to the rescue.
2. Tech Tangents: I love my iPhone.
3. Sermon Notes: John 13:1-11
4. Jeremiah is going to a pediatric endocrinologist in December.
5. I’m going back to the neurologist next week.
6. Random restaurants near Ft. Wood.

P.S. Rachel is blogging again! Which is probably what inspired me to start writing again… cause really, everyone should be a little more like Rachel Harmon.

Hey fellow Army Reserve Chaplain Candidates, check your AKO email.  You’re not IRR anymore…

Civilian translation:

Previously, Army Reserve Chaplain Candidates did not get to drill one weekend a month or do two weeks of annual training. They were in the Individual Ready Reserve (IRR). We’re being transfered to the Select Reserve. Which means we’re going to be active members of the Army Reserve… we get to drill and we get paid for it.

Don’t worry, Mom.  We’re still not deployable.

Jeremiah is doing P90X with his dad. He just did 10 pull-ups.