Rachel told me about a song she heard on the radio. It told of a father missing out on his kid’s life because he was always on the road. We talked about this Army life and the inevitable separation that we dread.

Sarah walked into the room when I still had this on my mind. I know how much of a mama’s girl she is and how much she missed her daddy when he was deployed. I asked her, “Sarah, are you mad about me being a Chaplain?” She said no. I asked, “Are you excited about it?” Her reply, “Yes!” “What if I go to war?” I asked. She quickly answered, “Then I’d like to stay with daddy.” I asked if she’d write me letters every day and send me Rice Krispies treats. She smiled, promising to send me dairy free treats. She climbed up onto my lap. She hugged me and asked, “But what if you die?” “Well, then I’ll see you in heaven” I said as I kissed her forehead. “You are going to be there aren’t you?” She smiled and said yes. I told her, “Don’t worry, chaplains don’t usually die. None have died in the Iraq or Afghanistan wars.” She looked a bit relieved and said, “Really? I didn’t know that. Why?” I told her they try to keep us safe cause we’re so important. She laughed and ran off to play.

It was a light-hearted conversation about a serious topic. My little girl. To her, nothing is worse than a day without hugs from mom… and yet she bravely looks toward tomorrow knowing I’ll probably be deployed in a few years. She’s not just some kindergartner who doesn’t understand… her daddy just came home from Afghanistan. She knows how what it means.

I asked her why she wanted me to be a chaplain if she doesn’t want me to go away. I expected some sort of answer about telling soldiers about Jesus. Instead she said I need to go to war “to keep the soldiers safe.” I asked her how I am supposed to do that. She whispered, “Tell them to try to stay alive.”