Today is the day.  The day I see some results.

(That makes it sound like I’ve actually accomplished something or completed a project… but no. )

No it’s not the results of all my hard work… it’s the results of my CT scan.  I’m going back to the ENT today.

I really don’t know what I want to hear.  They could say I need surgery.  That would be frightening and hopeful… Frightening because Rachel just had sinus surgery and it hasn’t sounded pleasant at all.  Hopeful because maybe it would help.  They could say I don’t need surgery.  That would be a disappointing relief.  Relieving because then I don’t have to have someone hack bits of my sinuses out of my forehead. Disappointing because then I have to just keep trying different prescriptions… prescriptions don’t actually help… they just make me rattle when I walk, spray stuff up my nose till I want to die, or feel like one of the ancient regulars at the pharmacy counter.  Soon the cute little girls in the lab coats or smocks will be calling me Ms. Maxwell and offering to write my checks for me and help me to the car.

I’m also expecting some other results today… replies to my emails to various seminary offices asking for mercy in the form of extensions.  (No no, not hair extensions… though I might need them if a certain little girl doesn’t stop making me want to pull my hair out.) Extensions in the form of delayed due dates… cause sniff, sniff… cough, hack… I can’t see straight or think clearly enough to write a theological masterpiece, a research paper, a book analysis, or even a sentence exegetical outline.

Really, I just need a nap.  I wish I was in preschool, I’d get an A in naps. But not snack time.  I’d get an F in snack time. My recent culinary decisions nearly sent me to the ER. Cheese is bad.  Cheese is bad. Cheese is bad.  I have to write this on the board 500 times then write an essay about the evils of pepperoni and sausage… Yeh can I get an extension on that?  Dry erase markers would make me dizzy and chalk dust would only make my allergies worse and… and… ooh is it nap time?

The phone rang early this morning.  I fumbled to pull it to my ear and heard a lovely voice… the automated school phone system saying that school is canceled due to inclement weather.  Ahhhhh!  The kids will be thrilled.  Not that they don’t love school… but they love snow days even more.

I should be driving to Springfield for class in an hour or two.  That won’t be happening.  I doubt I could make it down this mountain and to the interstate… and even if I could, I would have to take my kids with me.

I considered staying in bed but decided to roast some coffee and clean the dining room instead.  Ahhh the smell of … wait that’s not coffee, it’s orange scented Pledge.  I really must get my chronic sinusitis taken care of.  It’s bringing me down.  That’s the real reason I didn’t sleep in.  I couldn’t breathe.

I went to an ENT last week and had a CT scan of my sinuses this Monday.  I go back to the doctor next week to get the results and come up with a plan.

(I realize that with how seldom I write lately, this post could be on top of the front page for a while… This is what’s wrong with blogs… people read about the latest sinus infection and completely miss out on the genius hidden in the archives… yes, I said genius.)

I’ve been really sick for a while now.  I go to the doc once or twice a month and get antibiotics and various prescriptions hoping that it will help.  It never does.  Thankfully I’ve finally been referred to a specialist.

The sinus stupidity mixed with chronic pain have done horrible things to my seminary studies.  I have several incompletes hanging over my head.  The professors and administration have been merciful.  More merciful than I have, it makes me feel like a failure… you know what with all the failing and all.

The greatest thing about being sick or hurting all the time (besides being sick and hurting) is the lovely advice I receive… oh and the exhortation… gotta love exhortation.  Oooh ooh and suggestions that I’m sick because of spiritual weakness or sin in my life… I Love That!

Religious Jargon Alert: Exhortation
Definition 1: Exhortation is an act or instance of exhorting…well that clears it up doesn’t it? Let’s try the second definition, “language intended to incite and encourage”  Um… OK.  I always thought it just meant encourage. But in this context, I think the word incite fits better… which officially means spur to action but my specific situation makes me think of  ”incite to violence…” but I digress.

(Wow, I sound bitter and angry don’t I?  I’m not, I just have a headache and an early morning case of sarcasm.  Read everything I say with one of those little winky emoticons.  <— see doesn’t that look jovial?)

Yesterday morning, I felt miserable.  I wanted to get on facebook and ask all of my friends to pray for me… but I didn’t.  Because I didn’t want a lecture about faith or my inability to minister if I don’t believe God will heal me.

(For the record, Me and God… we’re doing pretty good.  Thanks for askin’.  I know he’s strong and loving and he knows I’m dust… we work well together that way… even if I don’t capitalize pronouns referring to deity. )

Gracious!  Do you see how disjointed this post has become?  Now we know why I haven’t written my final paper for Dr. Lim.  Perhaps I should sign off and go make breakfast for my little girl.

Logging into Wordpress on Gentlewhisper.com is like finding an old forgotten journal… “Oh Yeh! I used to write in here!”

I approve a couple comments and ignore the highlighted reminder, “Wordpress 2.8.5 is available! Please update now.” “Yes, Yes I’ll do that soon,” I think to myself as I wipe the dust off of my neglected blog. “But first, I must update my readers… the few that haven’t forgotten me.”

October is nearly over and with it, half of my 6th semester at seminary. I’ve been sick and stressed, once again I find myself falling behind in my studies. I’m on day three of my antibiotics so hope still lingers.

We’re driving to Springfield in a few hours. Jeremiah is running a 5k tomorrow morning. I’m very excited for him. I wanted to run with him but my health won’t allow it. I’m afraid he’d have to drag his mommy across the finish line. We’ll enjoy the day in Springfield and maybe even go to a play at Evangel. As if that weren’t enough excitement for one weekend, Sunday morning gets even better. Joel is running a marathon! If you know his story, you know how incredible that is. I’ll retell the adventure next week when I have photos to go with it. Oh, I’m thrilled! Proud of my man and so very thankful.

Okay, let’s see… you need a quick life update.

Seminary:
I’m taking three classes. Building a Disciple Making Ministry, Communicating the Message II, and a New Testament study covering the epistles and Revelation. Fun fun.

Church:
We’re attending St. Robert First Assembly. It’s a small church with an interim pastor. I’ve had a lot of great opportunities to minister. I got to preach last week and I’ll get to lead the Wednesday night services in November and December. I’m loving it!

Family:
The kids love their new school. I baptized Jeremiah on Sunday. If I were a responsible blogger, I’d post some photos… but since I’m not, you can just check out the album on facebook. If I ever get caught up on my homework, I’ll write about that day.

Military:
I’m assigned to the 102nd Training Division at Ft. Leonard Wood. My first battle assembly is November 7th. Three other chaplain candidates from AGTS are assigned to my unit. I’m so excited!

Misc:
Now that I’ve started writing, I realize we have a lot of catching up to do! I’ll have to write again soon. Here are a few possible topics:

1. Tech Tangents: Mini 9 died, Dremel Tool to the rescue.
2. Tech Tangents: I love my iPhone.
3. Sermon Notes: John 13:1-11
4. Jeremiah is going to a pediatric endocrinologist in December.
5. I’m going back to the neurologist next week.
6. Random restaurants near Ft. Wood.

P.S. Rachel is blogging again! Which is probably what inspired me to start writing again… cause really, everyone should be a little more like Rachel Harmon.

I downloaded the Wordpress iPhone app. It wouldn’t work with my theme though. So I’m trying it out with the default theme. If it works, I’ll try to fix the old theme or make a new one.

Here’s a photo to test that feature.

We’re having an exciting adventure in rural Missouri.  The power steering pump went out and stranded us in Van Buren last night.  We’re waiting for a part.  I have a lot to write about.  Until then, you can read about all of the excitement in bite sized posts at twitter.com/gentlewhisper.

Don’t want to be too dramatic… but we’re homeless and neither of our cars are driveable.  Ahhh but I have free wifi. No worries.

Attentive readers might have noticed that Sarah got here ears pierced in Knoxville, TN on Saturday… but wait I told you we were at Ft. Leonard Wood!  What’s going on with this crazy globe trotting family?

There wasn’t any housing available on post and we couldn’t find any temporary housing either.  Not knowing how long it would take for a house to be read on post, we fell back to our plan B.  We decided to get a temporary place at Springfield and send the kids to their old school until something became available on post.  Joel’s active duty orders don’t begin until the end of October so we don’t HAVE to live near Ft. Wood until then.

So, after spending almost a week together in a hotel at St. Robert, Joel flew to Austin and the kids and I drove back to Tennessee.  Springfield schools starts next week so there was no reason to waste money on a hotel until then.  Of course we could have stayed with random friends at Springfield… but this feels like home.

Right now, the plan is to drive to Springfield on Saturday or Sunday.  Meet the Teacher is on Monday morning and the elementary school starts on Tuesday.  Classes at AGTS start next week too.

That’s the plan… but Joel is also looking for a house off post that we can rent.  We found a beautiful one listed that is available on September 1st.  He’s going to call about it today.  There are lots of other ifs and maybes that complicate the process.  No worries.  I’ll let you know when we find a place to unpack our stuff.

Meanwhile, I’ve enjoyed spending the summer with my best friend.  I look forward to seeing everyone in Springfield and I can’t wait to see Joel! (He’s in Kansas right now, I’m not sure when we’ll see eachother again.)

I am generally opposed to piercings. Yes, yes even the ubiquitous and completely socially acceptable earlobe piercings. I just think it is silly to poke unnecessary holes into a person’s head… belly button… or anything else. Beyond that, I think it’s silly to spend money on shiny bits of metal to stick in these unnecessary holes in your head. I realize that few people agree with me on this… and I don’t sit around judging people who disagree. You can take an industrial sized hole puncher to your face if you want. I’ll still love you. But generally speaking… I’m not a big supporter of the body piercing industry.

Ah but I have a daughter. She has never asked to get her ears pierced. She often looked longingly at earrings but worried about the potential pain of piercing. I appreciated that fear, it meant I didn’t have to tell her “no” if she asked.

Holding Sarah’s hand, I walked through the Knoxville mall on Saturday. We passed the kind of store that I never take Sarah into… the girly earring and cheap jewelry kind of store… my nightmare and Sarah’s dream come true. Pink frilly aliens must have taken control of my mouth at that moment. Spontaneously, I asked if Sarah would like to get her ears pierced. Surprised, she said, “Yes!” We called her daddy to make sure it was OK with him then went to get it done before either of us changed our mind.

Sarah must have given me a thousand hugs and thank you’s that day. She woke up on Sunday morning and once again overwhelmed me with her thanksgiving.

She turns seven on September 9th. Send earrings.

Here’s a slide show of me compromising my piercing principles for my little princess.