No school today. That means it’s time to make a tutorial video…

How to make Ranchup. A tutorial by Jeremiah age 7. Video by Sarah age 6. Background noise by Mom age 31…

GPH Handbells

Earlier this week, I wrote about depression. This is a follow-up to that post.

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I’ve noticed something about people who haven’t had to battle depression. They offer well meaning, useless advice. It doesn’t actually matter if their words contain wisdom or not… somehow any quickly offered simple solution only makes things worse. How could this be? Well, if you offer a seemingly obvious, simple solution to a problem someone has been struggling with for years… it’s offensive. It either insults their intelligence, suggests they don’t really want to get better, or underestimates the true nature of the problem.

This is true for a lot of different struggles, addictions, disorders and sins.

Here are some examples:

Telling someone dealing with depression:
“Decide to be happy.”

Telling someone plagued by an eating disorder:
“Eat more.” or “Stop throwing up.”

Telling someone tempted by self-harm:
“Stop cutting.”

Telling someone addicted to porn:
“Stop using the Internet.”

All of this ‘good’ advice can be boiled down to simply state, “stop it.” This doesn’t address the real root of the problem. It often just tries to sweep away the most offensive symptoms.

These useless bits of advice remind me of the “Psychologist” skit Bob Newhart did on MadTV.

Easy answers don’t get to the heart of the problem. So, if you’ve found yourself giving out such counsel…

STOP IT!
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This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t offer practical support. For example, a commenter recently told me to get my Vitamin D, Iron and Magnesium levels checked to help fight fatigue. A friend told me to call Military OneSource and get the six free counseling sessions that are available for service members and their families. This was helpful advice.

Admittedly, I’ve told a friend dealing with an eating disorder to “eat something… right now.” That wasn’t my only advice though, and I didn’t act as if it was the answer to the problem or a ticket to freedom.

So what’s the difference? I don’t know. Perhaps acknowledging the real nature of the battle. Oversimplification doesn’t solve anything. A porn addict’s problem isn’t the Internet. A cutter’s problem isn’t razor blades. Eating isn’t really the problem with people fighting an eating disorder. And a depressed person’s problem isn’t simply that they don’t act cheerful enough.

What do you think? Have you ever struggled with something and received advice that amounts to nothing more than “Stop it?” What advice was given? Did it help or make things worse? Please answer in the comments, and feel free to remain anonymous if you’re not yet comfortable talking about the issue. While you’re at it, please tell us what words actually helped.

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In an upcoming post on this topic: Personal responsibility and God’s mercy.

Rachel and I watched Baghdad ER – An HBO Documentary Film last month. As the name suggests, it’s an HBO documentary about a military emergency room in Baghdad, Iraq. It’s pretty graphic, has nudity and bad language… War is like that.

One of our guest lecturers in my military chaplaincy class was a chaplain who served in a Baghdad ER. His stories and photos were a lot more graphic than HBO… He spoke of telling a soldier he was going to die and letting him borrow his cell phone to call home… all while we looked at a photo of his fatal injury on the big screen in front of us.

The young men and women who work in these hospital see things humans weren’t meant to see… over and over and over.

They need chaplains.

HBO’s site: Baghdad ER

The product description exclaims,

“Nothing radiates the endless love of Jesus like the shimmering light of nearly a half carat of full cut diamonds – perfectly set in solid 18k gold. Worn close to your heart, our uniquely elegant Pavè Tear boldly expresses your love and faith.”
Regular Price: $999.95
Special Offer: $849.95

What?! How does spending 850 bucks on a shiny necklace boldy express your faith? How does a diamond encrusted drop of gold radiate the endless love of Jesus more than anything else?

If we want to radiate Christ’s endless love let’s put away our selfish vain greed and actively love people.

How about using that money to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, care for the sick, visit those in prison, and minister to widows and orphans?

James 2:14-17

Matthew 25:34-40

I know it’s just marketing, advertising, a way to sell stuff. But I’m tired of it. I’m tired of people thinking Christianity and unbridled consumerism somehow go hand in hand. Our culture sells us a lie, and the church continues to buy it… on credit. How much is the interest going to cost? How soon till we’re spiritually bankrupt?

Music Video: Shawn McDonald – Greed

Jeremiah just realized that he can read the Bible to himself. After trying out a few versions, he’s gotten comfortable with the NLT HoneyWord Bible. [Mostly because the font is bigger.] Here he is reading Genesis 1.

Check out this video of a mission done by Improv Everywhere… who do a lot of crazy stunts.

Hat Tip: 2020 Hindsight